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Hey mom. How you doing today sweetie? I'm good. What's wrong? Why so sad? Everything okay? Yeah I guess. What do you mean?

You guess? What's wrong? I don't know. I'm like not having a girlfriend and everything. Oh I hear about that. It's been so long.

You never have one actually. I hear that you have a lot of female friends. Is that true? Well yes. It's a little uncomfortable talking to you about it but yes.

Oh you can talk to me son about anything. So did you ever look for a girl in your school? Yeah I tried. I have a lot of female friends but I never really wanted to do anything.

Oh I'm so sorry son. I have some idea about that. We can talk and maybe you and me can have sex. Wait mom. Well I'm a holy god woman son.